REGRETS

I’ve had a few.

If I’m totally honest with myself, I’ve had a lot. But some of the things I’ve done, especially as a stupid kid but even as a stupid adult (which happens way more often than I want it to), are too embarrassing to admit out loud. Well, maybe some are worth mentioning. There was the time I left the plug out of my father’s bass boat while carrying my girlfriend (now wife) and three other couples on a night-time cruise (we all survived, by the way). There was the time I used a bootleg software copy and got reported (that won’t happen again!). Oh yeah, there was that time when my bladder couldn’t hold that last beer (Yeesh! And I thought I was past all the pants-peeing in first grade). Charlie Brown said sometimes trying to do a good job is like peeing in dark pants. It gives you a warm feeling, but nobody notices. Unfortunately, I wore khakis that day.

I don’t know, I think regrets are like shipwrecks. We’re reckless and hit something; it can be a disaster. But after you try to save the ones you can from the consequences of your stupid actions, sometimes all you can do is learn from your mistakes.

For some reason, I’ve had the Titanic on my mind all through this terrible month. In its time, the great ship was the biggest of the big, the best of the best. It was indestructible. One of the wonders of the world. Then, the thing nobody thought was possible happened. The Titanic sank. And took 1,500 souls with her. A HUGE disaster. Maybe someone decided to go too fast in foggy weather or maybe someone hesitated for a second before relaying the iceberg sighting. Definitely, someone limited the number of lifeboats because they could get away with it.

Human mistakes. We all make them. If we’re smart, we regret them and learn from them. More caution, more eyes on the horizon, more thought that the “impossible” might actually happen.

Whatever we do, we can’t undo our mistakes. We can get lucky. We can learn to be more prudent. We can listen to our consciences. We can listen to our bladders. Though sometimes humiliating, those were all relatively small mistakes. It’s when the big iceberg hits our family and friends that the real sorrow begins. We can’t raise the wreck from the bottom of the sea and start over as if it never happened. Afterward, we may no longer be able to visit a brother or check on a friend or be kind to someone in need.

So, regrets? Yes, a few. Unlike Mr. Sinatra, many more than I’d like to mention. But, what can a man do about it?  

He can still “say the things he truly feels and not the words of one who kneels” (by the way, my favorite line of the song). But he can learn. And the next time, he can do better.

Image Credit: Titanic Sinking, Willy Stöwer, 1912, Public Domain